The very last rule
by Pumpkingirl
Summary: Gibbs/Tony father/son, songfic  Oasis - Stop crying your heart out  Tony has lost somebody who was very close to him and he can't cope with the pain himself. But is he really alone? WARNING: MAIN CHARACTER DEATH!


**A/N:** This is a Gibbs/Tony oneshot - angst, H/C, or whatever you want to call it:) The song I used is "Stop crying your heart out" by Oasis. **Warning: Main character death!**

**Disclaimer:** I do not own NCIS and its characters, I'm just playing with them, because it's so much fun.

* * *

Bang.

Tony's fist struck hard against the cool wall of the basement.

As a response to that, Gibbs ran the sandpaper along on the surface of the semi-finished boat. He did that so slowly, he was caught up in the movement, until…

Bang.

Tony hit the wall even harder and more desperately. Maybe he really believed that this action would make the pain go away.

The rough paper's sound long accompanied the rumble, as it scraped against the material.

Bang.

Tony's forehead was already resting on the crude stonewall when his hand struck it again. His heavy breathing filled the air with enough emotion for Gibbs to feel that things may go out of control in a minute.

For one last time the sound of work composed its canon with Tony's pain, then Gibbs put the sandpaper down on the table. He blew the wood shavings off of the work area.

Bang.

Tony's arm swung once again in the air and finally came to a standstill on the wall.

Gibbs passed his hand over the side of the boat, as he stepped closer to the other man.

His fingers didn't feel the warmth of the wood, as he didn't sense either, that it would have been cold in the basement, in spite of the fact that he could see his agent was shivering.

"Why are you still here, Tony?" he asked. "You better be at home, sleeping, or working, or doing something. Because _this _doesn't make any sense."

Tony's breathing became faster, but he turned around slowly. He wiped away the tears with both of his hands, removing the evidence that they had been there at all. He was looking in Gibbs' direction for a moment, then walked to the boat and stroked the wood just like his boss had done a minute before. However his fingers left a trail of salty tears behind them on its surface.

"Damn it, Gibbs! Why the hell didn't you give me a call?" he asked staring at the shell of the boat. His voice was trembling from the tension.

Gibbs didn't like the way he avoided eye contact, but he couldn't do anything against it. This was just another thing that has lost between them, a thing that he couldn't fix.

"You would be dead, DiNozzo. You would be dead, _too_. You think that would make anybody feel happier?" he asked.

"That would have been a thousand times better, if I had been the one there. At least I wouldn't have to feel this... this... " He couldn't end the sentence, because his voice faltered and tears came flowing down his face. He dug his fingers into his hair, his whole body grew rigid as he tensed his muscles.

Gibbs saw that he was about to collapse, so he made his way to him quickly and took him into his arms, just when Tony's legs gave out. Gibbs held the sobbing boy tight, and made him sit down on the floor. Sitting next to him, he hugged him gently and let Tony's grip tighten on him, as the boy buried his head into the older man's shoulder.

Gibbs let him cry – it was something he would have never allowed him in an everyday situation, something he would have given him a slap for; not on the back of the head, but on the face. Though here and now had nothing to do with an ordinary day, and people usually don't like to hurt the other, while saying good bye.

So as he was stroking Tony's hair, he was trying to comfort him with sweet whispering:

_**"Hold up**_

_**Hold on  
Don't be scared  
You'll never change what's been and gone"**_

"Don't do this, Tony! You know, you have to hold on, you especially! For the others, for yourself – for me. Shhh…"

Gibbs pushed his face against Tony's, and he went on whispering his words as a lullaby:

"You can't change what happened, Tony. There are slaps you get from life, slaps, you have to bear. I got some of those myself, because there are no exceptions, everybody gets hurt sometimes. You're gonna learn how to stand the pain, with pride. This is another lesson, Tony, the last rule, but maybe the most important."

Tony was still crying aloud, he seemed inconsolable. Jethro leaned his face against DiNozzo's head, and he was smiling into his hair. He held his senior field agent in his arms now, as if he was a little boy. Tony has never, ever been broken so much that _he_ would have been the one, who had to hold his pieces together. And Gibbs couldn't even say that he _lived_ the time to see that.

But only a child could cry as passionately for a lost toy, as Tony was crying now because of the scathing pain.

_**"May your smile (may your smile)  
Shine on (shine on)  
Don't be scared (don't be scared)  
Your destiny may keep you warm"**_

"Never show your fear, kid! It's such a basic thing, I thought I don't have to teach you, but I see I was wrong. If you have to be the strongest, and you fail, you may lose the ground under your feet and if it happens, you take everybody with you. You don't want to make them miserable, don't you?"

Tony moved his head and Gibbs took that as a 'yes'.

He went on:

"Good. Then you should keep your temper, DiNozzo. Try to improve your self-control, I know you can do that!"

Tony finally began to speak, but his voice was shaking, his tears were still pouring down his cheeks. He wouldn't ease his hold on Gibbs, not for the world.

"Boss, I… I won't be able to go through with it. I'm not ready for this, not yet. Oh, god, yesterday everything was okay, but now… everything…"

Gibbs kept on smiling into Tony's hair, and the young agent could almost feel his warm breath behind his ear. It was like this encouraging and comforting feeling would have carried on yarning him about how life goes on.

And Gibbs went on with talking to the desperate boy.

"Don't ever look back, only forward! _Always_ forward, Tony. If things go wrong, then let the future set them straight! You already know your way, and you're even familiar with it."

With one hand he wiped away the tears on Tony's face.

"_**Cos all of the stars  
Are fading away  
Just try not to worry  
You'll see them some day  
Take what you need  
And be on your way  
And stop crying your heart out**_"

"Calm down, and pull yourself together! For God's sake Tony, would you stop crying already?"

Gibbs was still talking low, but this time he awakened him with a more powerful voice to tell him that what he said wasn't a suggestion, but an order. And Tony obeyed him, as he always did: he smudged his tears and finally held his head up.

"_**Get up (get up)  
Come on (come on)  
Why are you scared? (I'm not scared)  
You'll never change  
What's been and gone**_"

Gibbs ran his fingers through the boyish mop of hair, and then he stood up and reached out his hand for him.

"Get up!" he said.

But Tony didn't move, he was staring at the boat again, like he was mesmerized.

"Come on, DiNozzo, don't make me say that twice!"

This time Tony scrambled to his feet, but he didn't accept Gibbs' hand. He stepped to the table and took the sandpaper in his hand, the one which his boss was working with some minutes before.

"Hey!" Gibbs told him smiling. "For some reason I've got the feeling you don't know how to use that..."

Tony shrugged his shoulders while he was staring at the wood in front of him.

"It can't be that difficult." He mumbled, and then put the tool on the wood.

Gibbs stepped behind him just in time to join into the movement, so he could stop Tony from causing any harm.

"Alright, always with the grain of the wood."

Tony showed a teary grin.

"See, Gibbs? I'm kinda great in carpentry, though you've never taught me how to do it."

Gibbs' hands lay on Tony's, he was the one, who led them on their way up and down. The young agent kept on smiling and he did his best to sound confident, when he spoke again:

"Such a good carpenter can be better than best in the office, can't he?"

_**"Cos all of the stars  
Are fading away  
Just try not to worry  
You'll see them some day  
Take what you need  
And be on your way  
And stop crying your heart out"  
**_

But another teardrop fall down on the wood yet, and found its way downwards.

"I said I don't want to see you cry, DiNozzo!" Gibbs whispered into his ear.

"I'm not crying," Tony resisted. "Damn it, I'm not crying! I just got all this dust in my eyes. You really should keep this place clean, Gibbs, you really do…"

After a few minutes, when the monotonous movement has finally helped him to calm down, he put down the sandpaper and passed by Gibbs. He walked to the stairs hanging his head down just to hold it up again while taking a last look at the empty basement. He was standing silently, drawing up the words in his mind – it felt a bit weird for him to talk to a soulless room, but he knew, that if there is a place where Gibbs could hear him, that was it.

"Boss" he started. "I am the one who should have been there at the time of the explosion. I am the one, who should be dead. I'm sorry I wasn't there instead of you, you have no idea how much I am sorry. But we won't waste our time. we'll catch that dirtbag, that's responsible for your death! I swear, I'll take my revenge! And don't you worry about the others, I'm gonna take care of them. I won't let Tim eat too much chocolate, Abby to get away from the point, Ziva to kill more than necessary, or Ducky to talk too much! I'm gonna protect them, I'm gonna be there for them, like you always were there for us. Sure I am. And I promise, that I'll never, ever waste my time with crying my heart out, never again. 'Cause I know now that it's a rule which can't be broken, without making you disappointed. And I don't want to disappoint you! I'm already familiar with this rule, Gibbs. And as for a lot of things, I have to say thank for it only you. Thank you…"

Tony threw a last long glance at the basement, then ran up the stairs.

_**"Cos all of the stars  
Are fading away  
Just try not to worry  
You'll see them some day  
Take what you need  
And be on your way  
And stop crying your heart out"  
**_

Gibbs listened with a serious face to his agent, whom he was holding in his arms just now, like he was a lost child. It seemed to him, that that child became a man in the past five minutes. Gibbs knew, he could trust Tony, he knew he would keep his promise. When the boy hurried up the stairs, that typical half-smile played on Gibbs' face, the one that was his sign of contentment and love.

And even the basement, the boat, and the tools saw their owner for the last time that night.

_**"We're all of us stars  
We're fading away  
Just try not to worry  
You'll see us some day  
Just take what you need  
And be on your way  
And stop crying your heart out  
Stop crying your heart out  
Stop crying your heart out"**_

_**

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**_**A/N: Thanks for reading! Reviews are appreciated!:)**_**  
**_


End file.
